Christmas traditions — what does that mean exactly? The definition of tradition is “the transmission of customs or beliefs from generation to generation, or the fact of being passed on in this way.” I love that!
Looking back over my life, I realize most of my Christmas traditions have changed throughout my life. As a small child, we’d travel to either Kansas or New Mexico, alternating years. I experienced large, loud holidays with extended family, loads of presents under the tree, and mountains of food. One year it snowed while we were in New Mexico, uncharacteristic for that time of the year. My parents panicked, wondering how they’d make it back to Arkansas for work and school. After that, we changed our travel plans to stay closer to home for the holidays, and our traditions changed as well. Being an only child, I missed those louder than life visits with family. We spent Christmas just the three of us, occasionally picking up an invitation to spend the day with friends. But I always spent Christmas with my parents.
Once I got married, traditions changed again. We had to alternate between families, sometimes spending Christmas with all our parents, but not always. I embraced new foods for Christmas, and opening presents on Christmas Day instead of Christmas Eve. This girl could take on new traditions like nobody’s business!
Then the children came along and we changed once again. We hosted Christmas, because it was easier to cook an entire holiday dinner than juggle baby paraphernalia across state lines. I saw the season through my children’s eyes, all the magic and the wonder and the joy. We wrote letters to Santa, filled the house with Christmas carols, and lit the Advent candles. My mother began a new tradition—baking Christmas cookies with her grandchildren. I’d been replaced as assistant baker, and I loved every minute of it.
Mom passed away in 2016, and our traditions changed once again. We tried baking Christmas cookies, but it just didn’t feel the same. My mother had been the center of all our holidays, and we struggled to find our path. Mom was the one who insisted we hop in the car and drive around looking at all the Christmas lights. Mom made sure we had plenty of holiday snacks and treats, to tide us over between each gigantic meal. As she’d aged, she relinquished the big family feast, because it was too taxing. But she delighted in taking time during the days before, to prepare simple yet mouth watering pop in your mouth delights. It took a few stumbles and starts to find our way during Christmas. Our hearts crumbled as our waistlines rejoiced. I didn’t fix the mountains of snacks reminiscent of my mother. Another tradition changed.
A couple Christmases ago, I pulled out a simple sugar cookie recipe, and found my mother’s cookie cutters. Mom had used her cookie press to create her wonderful cookies, so the metal cutters hadn’t been used in ages. I thought maybe this project would remind us of Mom, but not enough to make it painful. And it worked. We all had a blast rolling out the dough, cutting out the shapes, and popping them into the oven. We’d discovered a new tradition!
Cameron and Gracie are spending their first married Christmas in Houston with Gracie’s parents. I get it—it’s hard to make everything nice and even during the holidays. But this year, once again, we’ll change our traditions, to accommodate the changes in our lives. And that’s okay. Because who knows? Maybe I’ll come up with a new tradition. Maybe it will involve baking…or maybe Nerf guns…
Jann Goar Franklin graduated Russellville High School in 1985 and lives in Grand Cane, Louisiana. She also writes books, which are for sale at www.jannfranklin.com. You can reach her at jann@jannfranklin.com